This article was published 9 years ago. My views have probably evolved muchly since.
Did you ever consider why we cry at happy endings? Assuming that you cry at all. I’m a natural bawler. I’ve been crying since before puberty was a thing. The theory is I drowned in a past life and I’m still getting the water out of my system. So I cry at all sorts of endings.
But have you ever considered it? Why would anyone cry when they’re happy? I will openly admit that I didn’t. Until I came across the point in a book called Imponderables, good coffee book table reading material. According to the authors’ questioning the scientific community, and their respective answerings, nobody actually cries because they’re happy. Ever. What people are crying about when the see something happy is their own sense of “Aww, look at that. Why the fuck don’t I have it!”
The article explains that children, who are still all wide-eyed and have faith in the magical beauty of their future, do not feel any need to cry when they see something happy. It’s hunger, fear, pain, and desperate requirements for nappy changes that fuels their tear ducts, not happiness. It sounds plausible. I’m not really sure about the level of research that went it having skimmed through the rest of the writing, but it is something I’d buy if it were sold but since it was imparted relatively freely, I’ll just take it.
As we roll off to another calendar year, it’s worth pondering what types of happy endings you and I do find ourselves weeping over and whether is really may be because we’re selfish gits who are more concerned for having those endings happen to us instead. I certainly don’t want to be crying in the face of happiness because I’ve, at some deep level, given up on ever attaining that sense of happy, regardless of the form it’s being presented in.
So, while new year resolutions really aren’t my thing, if I were to do them, this would be the one. I will not, from this day forth, cry for a someone else’s happiness. For them I will laugh. And then I’ll laugh for me. Because, truth be told, when it does really come down to it, I can be quite a selfish git.