This has been an odd fortnight. One of the things that has come out of it is something I want to share with you and that is, no matter what’s happening around you and no matter where you’re at in your life, always remember your worth and your personal value.
I am blessed to have, over the last decade, attracted the amazing people that are currently such beacons of light in my life. It’s important to have a good support structure in your life because there will always be times when things are not going right, you may have too much on your plate or you’re just in an “off” phase. In these times, it is this support system that keeps you going, that lifts you up, and that reminds you how special you are.
Throughout my life, I’ve had a bit of a bipolar nature, jumping in moods from super excitement to severe depression. Lately, I’ve been in the lower range of my mood cycle. Fortunately, as I said, I’ve amazing people in my life who are able to provide the necessary support, say the right words and provide the required comfort that helps sustain me and not allow me to fall into a destructive spiral as I once did. More than that, my friends remind me of my own value and help boost my mood.
It’s not possible to be happy and driven all the time. We must have our off days. During this period, it may be important to be reminded that we are not our successes. We are not lab rats that must be happy when people and situations respond positively to us, and sad when things don’t seem to be going according to plan. We are always special and worthy, regardless of what our outside environment is reflecting to us.
One of my therapist friends reminded me yesterday of this.
I want to remind you today of your worth.
You have skills, capabilities and a personality that are solely you. You are a unique little snowflake in your own right. No one else lives life in the same way that you do.
Regardless of what is going on in your live, whether you perceive your situation to be good or bad, you are still an amazing and talented individual. There is something unique and special about you that you can share with the world. If you don’t know what that uniqueness is, an easy way to find out is to ask people. Ask your friends, your work colleagues, or even random people on the street.
Did you know that at the beginning of his acting career, Al Pacino did just that? He asked random people on the street what character they saw him as, and from their answers he shaped his performance character into the gangster-style we’ve come to know and love.
“Nobody can be exactly like me. Sometimes even I have trouble doing it.”
– Tallulah Bankhead
We can easily fall into the trap of comparing ourselves to other people. We compare our successes to theirs, our possessions to theirs, our relationships to theirs. It’s very easy to undervalue ourselves if we do this.
If you’re a person who is constantly trying to keep up with the Jones, stop right now!
Instead, focus on your own strengths. Even if you’re not the only person with your particular skills and talents, the way in which you make use of those talents will still be unique to you. Determine what your strong skills are, and determine how you can best demonstrate those skills.
It is also important to choose your feedback. There are people who will tear you down for no real reason. Don’t pay them any mind. There are people who can provide positive criticism. Learn from what they tell you and grow yourself accordingly. Then there are the people that boost our egos with their comments. Revel in that positive feedback but do not rely on it to keep you happy.
Remember it though. Keep records of positive testimonials and pin them on your fridge. If you’re in a place where you’re not getting external positive feedback, at least you can remind yourself that you are still worthy. This isn’t an excuse to ride on old successes. This is a technique to use to boost yourself so you can realise current and future successes.
Always note and remember your successes, no matter how small. Always put aside your failures once you’ve learnt from them. Always remember your worth, and continually work toward increasing that worth. You are in charge of your own value. The more you focus on your value and increasing that value, and the more you spend time with the type of people who support and promote your value, the more you will feel better about yourself, and the more you will believe in both your selfworth and value.
Your value will never decrease. Remember this. Especially when you’re feeling a little down.